


Cold, Cold, Warm

by IwriteDreams



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa 3: The End of 希望ヶ峰学園 | The End of Kibougamine Gakuen | End of Hope's Peak High School, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: A thing, Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Its 3 am, Multi, and im ready to scrah too, grammerly kept rashing, uggggfgldajgjgf
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-13
Updated: 2017-08-13
Packaged: 2018-12-14 20:18:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11790693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IwriteDreams/pseuds/IwriteDreams





	Cold, Cold, Warm

Nagito knew the rough cold texture of the rugged stone walls of the castle against his back well. Backing into a wall in fear was probably one of the most common things in his time at Hogwarts.

He also knew the feeling of hot shame and regret well, and the feeling of a handknit golden-blue scarf covering his mouth as he tried to shrink back into it. He was trying to get to class on time, of course he’d gotten careless.

So of course, he ended up tripping over a girl, sending her crashing to the floor to break her wrist, the fall also breaking his wand, trying to heal her with a well practiced charm, the only thing he seemed to excel at, and ended up cursing her to share pain with him. A particularly hard spell to reverse.

He could still hear the poltergeist, A large snake like robotic spirit, laughing at him in the infirmary, until Usami whisked it away with a rabbit Patronus. Nagito, not sure why a Patronus would work on some robotic poltergeist, just let his head collapse back onto the pillow.

Professor Yukizome, his beloved charm teacher had to some in, and break the curse he’d unintentional let upon both himself and the girl. A Slytherin musician, who just cried, and complained, and blamed him for being late to practice. Telling him he was lucky that there was a fast fix for things like this because she needed the time to practice her instrument before the Yule ball.

“What the fuck were you thinking?!”

Nagito looked down at a wand covered in tape. A cold wall in a cold courtyard after the whole affair, the day after. He was still getting used to having bones inside of him again.

The Slytherin girl, having the curse severed and wrist healed went off to practice. Apparently, she was in Sayaka Minoso’s band.

This wasn’t the first time Nagito had unintentionally poked the bear that was Sayaka Mizono.

“This was the 4th goddamn time this year!” She howled, there was a wand poking at his throat. She… she wasn’t body you wanted to tangle with. The pure rage and resentment on her face were carved there, and Nagito knew there was no glossing over or getting out of it. He wondered what spell she would cast on him in her anger, what misery she would put him though.

“Sayaka.” Came some command from behind them, Sayaka, inches away from his face, mid curse and growl turned to see somebody that Nagito also didn’t want to tangle with more than he had to.

Byakuya Togami stood proudly. HIs robes perfectly crisp and clean. Not a fingerprint on his glasses, not a stray hair, not a single light that made his eyes look anything other than the piercing blue that they were as he glowered at him. He raised his wand with such a perfectly straight motion, it almost made Nagito wonder if he was dreaming.

“I’ll take care of this one.”

Sayaka glared back, she was ready to give Nagito a fair share of cursing, but even she wouldn’t disobey Togami. Head boy, despite some of his shady actions, and violent behavior towards Nagito. Well, leave it up to Nagito to be cornered in an abandon courtyard by two of the nicest Slytherins out there, somehow persuading them that he deserved to die. Cold walls, cold courtyard, cold hands, cold people.

Nagito didn’t want to say anything. It was something muggles said sometimes, “anything you say will be held against you.”

Sayaka backed away and a taller Togami took her place. Nagito felt the ground under him slowly begin to fade from existence. He wasn’t afraid if Togami decided to kill him, he didn’t mind. Besides, it was hard to be afraid, really, when this happened every day. Sometimes it was scarier.

“You think you’re funny?” Byakuya asked him, his glare from behind the lenses of his glasses. Nagito wonders if his eyes are infused with the stupefy spell. “What a shame, you can’t seem to pull yourself together and stop bringing shame to purebloods, can you?”

Nagito tore his eyes off of Byakuya. Before tucking deeper into the scarf that Hinata had knit for him. There hadn’t been a single day that had gone by where he hadn’t worn it. Maybe things were not so bad. “Do you know how many candid speeches that Headmaster Kirigiri has given us about purebloods not being better? How ‘pureblood’ meant nothing!?”

Byakuya went for more of an intimidation factor. A wand placed on his forehead, pushing his head up with a sharp prod, his face inches from his own, forcing his to retreat from the safety of the yarn comforter, and stare him in the eye. “Professor Kizakura just told the entirety of transfiguration that you are proof the ‘pureblood’ is worthless, how dare you, you fucking scoundrel!”

Byakuya’s voice cracked. Nagito’s resolution to be brave had cracked. The walls were cracked, his wand was cracked. Keeping the eye contact, Byakuya’s other fist, completely out of Nagito’s sight, came and found him, and one of his ribs also cracked.

A shock of pain pierced him in the chest, and a whimper broke though.

“How could you possibly-!” Another punch, at the already broken rib, send Nagito’s world reeling, it was on fire, a tense pain that comes with your very structure being broken clean off. Internal bleeding, no doubt. “Make people- THINK!”

Byakuya adjusts his grip, his full palm taking the place of his wand, pressing Nagito’s head back into the cold, broken wall. Nagito coughed, trying to curl over himself but he couldn’t. “That I am just like them!” He glanced behind him at Sayaka who looked, rather unphased. “Don’t even get me started-” He snarled as another heavy punch connected, completely pushing all the air out of Nagito's lungs, wincing again, it hurt, it hurt so badly. “About how you ruin everything for other people!” Nagito’s coughing up the last of his air, but Togami isn’t close to being done.

“Nobody fucking wants you here- not a soul! You can’t walk through a fucking hallway without breaking a girls wrist, cursing her, cursing yourself, then make somebody fail your own goddamn recovery! We all hate you!”

Nagito feels tears start to well up in his eyes, and his lip is trembling. The knowledge that Togami is totally correct is probably colder than any wall in the world. Or courtyard, or hands.

The pain is beginning to lose its edge as Nagito’s head pounds, and as he bites down on his lip as hard as he can, what’s a little more pain? He won’t blubber like a small child, if this is enough to break him, then he’s even more worthless than Togami, Sayaka and himself alike think he is. Only, it’s hard. It’s so hard to not be even worse than they think you already are, and here they are doing everything to hurt you, to drive you away, to kill you, they all want you dead, and you deserve even more hate than them- where did he go wrong?

Another sucker punch makes Nagito feel like he’s going to suffocate. He’s choking on the tears, when he breathes all he gets is salt water, not air, and there’s a sharp ring on Togami’s finger that’s beginning to dig into the rib above the one that was already well broken.

He deserves this, and as Sayaka lets out an affirmative cheer and happy expression when Togami glances back for a moment, Nagito wonders if he will ever not deserve this. He just wanted to walk to his goddamn class. All he ever causes is trouble, nothing else.

“You make everybody look bad!” Now it’s a snarl coming from Sayaka. “Medics can’t heal you without removing bones, you can’t not curse people- no wonder you’re in Hufflepuff! Nobody else will fucking take you!”

Nagito hitches over in some corrupted hiccup when suddenly there's a hard tip of a high heeled shoe connecting with the side of his knee at full force. Even Togami can’t hold him up longer. His knee gives in, crumpling awkwardly. There’s no telltale crack, but as His knee shots out from under him, bending inward until he crumpled to the cold ground, back to a cold wall, he has a cold feeling that knees aren’t supposed to bend that far inwardly and that it shouldn't hurt that much. But he can’t feel what pain is were. All he feels is pain. It’s just everywhere. His breathing hiccups and his teeth lose their grip on his lip as he lets out a sob. He can feel the states from them, leagues above him, staring down with him. His tears are falling off his face. He isn’t sure who it comes from, but one of them gives him a hearty kick at his shoulder, before they murmured something between themselves. Nagito couldn’t quite hear it, but he didn’t care. If they stayed for more, beating him into the ground until he died of head trauma he might be able to die knowing he’d fully reaped what he’d sewn. In a way that self-harm couldn’t. A dirty atonement in some ways. If they left now… that was alright too. He probably should be begging for them to leave but he was so consumed… he couldn’t bring himself to care either way.

He didn’t care about himself, nobody cared about him unless he’d done more things wrong than usual… he was the pinnacle of “Not caring.” SOme suffering, nobody with a recorded painted in mistakes and regrets.

Togami spat on him. Dirty saliva hitting him square on the cheek, and he tucked himself in as best as he could without setting his rib on fire.

“Die in a fucking hole. As far as I’m concerned, you're a squib.”

Lips jittering, there were cold tears, a cold floor, a cold wall, his cold hands, and a warm feeling of hope.

Things had to get better.

⚮⚮⚮

“He still didn’t move. He heard hundreds of feet walking past him, some laughing… good times were only soaring by. Trampled on.

Good times hated Nagito Komeada.

He knew Hinata had found him the moment anybody crouched over him. He was the only one who would ever stop for him. Sometimes he wanted to scream at the sky, begging the gods that Hinata was in his house and all of his classes. He wanted Hinata to be in his life all the time, but it simply didn’t work out that way. Hinata was exclusive to passing times, and meals. If Nagito was lucky enough to not be noticed by the other Slytherins.

“Nagito?”

Nagito smiled. Hinata’s words were getting trampled out as well. It was amusing in some demented way in his demented mind.

“Nagito, are you okay?!” Hinata’s hands were on his shoulders. It must look strange, Hinata grabbing onto him, his head buried downwards into his knees, only partially on the right, were 2, maybe 3 ribs were broken.

“Nagito!”

Nagito curled up tighter at the sound of Hinata yelling at him, why was he wasting his air? Almost hoping that if he didn’t answer him, he might go away, and they could forget about the whole thing. He was crying, he was a weak person, nobody cared about him, curled to the cold wall, in the cold weather, against the cold world. Hinata should walk away… There was no way he’d make a fool of himself further. He was crying. Why the fuck did he have any right to do that? Crying made it seem like something that he didn’t deserve happened, of course, he wasn’t that insolent. Only, apparently, sitting here in tears, it showed him that even that had failed him. He had been too ignorant, too confident, overzealous, disgusting. Not a single redeeming quality left in his bones.

“Nagito, I need you to answer me!” Hinata said again, and Nagito was sure people were staring. He could feel their eyes glaring at Hinata yelling at him.

Nagito felt more tears rise up, and a paste bubbling up in his throat. He couldn’t swallow, and he couldn’t think. He had no right to be this torn up, nothing justified his actions, but that only made him feel worse, there was nothing he could possibly do at that point. He should bear his teeth, wipe his tears and lie to Hinata. Lying to Hinata was the last thing he wanted to do, knowing how kind Hinata could be towards him sometimes, and how honest he always was with him, but Nagito couldn’t bare making Hinata suffer.

Another arrogant thought. He almost kicked himself. Hinata wouldn’t worry about you. You letting him know that you feel as if you want to die leave no impact on him. He doesn’t care.

NOBODY DOES

Nagito’s heart stops, then leaps up, jamming in his throat when he hears the quiet whispering of students around them and feels Hinata wrap his arms all the way around him. Fistfuls of the backs of his robes, Hinata leaning over him, head in his down-tilted shoulder.

“Nagito… please answer me.”

Nagito felt his neck twitch, Hinata was so close to him- he couldn’t run away this time. He was cowardly to have tried, Nagito, you’re a stupid, worthless fool! “Nagito, at least look at me!”

Hinata was beginning to shake him a bit, having felt the irregular trembles that were tearing through his tears.

Nagito gave in. Who’s he to deny Hinata that, deny him success in whatever charity project he probably was, or became.

He looked up, no doubt looking even more unsightly then he already did on a regular basis, to see Hinata leaning into him, now his face was the one inches from him. Heterochromatic eyes gazing into his, Nagito flinched. It was his… his fault for that too. A misaimed spell, and Hinata would live with a red eye for the rest of his life. It was all unfair, everything. Why was Hinata still here?

“Nagito… hey, what happened to you?” HIs voice was soft and careful, like he was afraid of hurting him farther, rather than helping.

Nagito took all the strength he had left, and forced himself to smile. It was the weakest, most pathetic thing. Were the corners of his mouth were failing to work, but he tried anyway.

“Nothing, Hinata. I’m okay.”

HIs voice was pleading, he begged Hinata to believe just with his tone- only-

“DO you expect me to believe that?” Hinata frowned, arms still around him.

Nagito glanced back downwards, hesitating, before he… timidly put his arms around Hinata. He felt bad for hugging him, but not returning the favor was not awkward, and seemed to give the impression that he didn’t care about the gesture, which personally, couldn’t be further from the truth.

… not that ‘personality’ was a factor for Nagito that deserves to play any part in anything.

Hinata’s arm felt nice around him. Maybe that was all he needed, just… a good hug. Then again, it was probably just a cold reminder that Nagito would never deserve Hinata. Not now, or ever.

“PLease… tell me what happened.” Hinata managed quietly. “You know that I’ll keep you safe, and your privacy protected, but please Nagito… you have to let me know when things like this happen. Good god- are you bleeding?!”

 

Nagito withdrew his head, Hinata stepping back as well. Togami’s ring must’ve scraped the skin under his robes because a bit of blood was staining a golden undershirt.

“I’m fine.” Was the first thing Nagito could say, even though it was beyond a lost cause. “I fell.”

 

Hinata’s face dropped.

“Nagito… I really wish you would trust me… you know? Like… trust me to help you, trust that I like you… what’s stopping you from doing that?”

Nagito felt a lump work up in his throat. He usually did trust Hinata. Hearing Hinata say that he didn’t feel like he trusted him was… hard. Nagito trusted him more than anybody else. But the praise and genuine care that Hinata offered him… wasn’t what he wanted to hear right then. It was something he couldn’t hear when things got like this.

“I have to go.” was what came out instead.

Not thank you, or I appreciate it, or I’m sorry. Certainly not I love you, but ‘I have to go.’ A cold shouldered word. He shivered, a ripple through his whole body as he weakly tried to stand. It was no use, the moment he tried shifting weight onto his feet, his knee gave out again, and he cried out weakly from the thundershock of pain that festered in his rib cage. Hinta;s hands still wrapped around him, pulled up, to break his fall back onto the cold ground again.

“You can barely stand- Nagito… where does it hurt? At least tell me that! Come on- I need to know!” Hinata begged, somehow hunching even closer to him. “You look like you’re in… pain.”

Nagito looked up, somewhat irritable, even without any right to be. “I’m fine! I just… got beat up! Does it really matter to you so much?!”

Immediately he regretting raising his voice at all, even if he was still being relatively quiet. It was loud enough for other people to hear, which were still peering over as they passed. Like cars slowing down on a freeway to look at a dreadful car accident. That’s all he really was. An accident.

Hinata frowned. “Of course it matters- Who did this to you? We need to get you into the infirmary right away!”

Nagito bit back into his lip, his teeth finding the impression they had left full minutes ago, he’d been biting so hard. “Why bother?”

He could see Hinata process that, before his expression softened ten fold, and he gazed down lightly. He let go of Nagito’s robes crouching down again, before he started tucking Nagito’s scarf, the one he’d made, back over his shoulders with a somber expression. “Don’t be like this… Nagito, you know I care. Of course I do. It’ll be hard to process when you’re… like this, but we’re going to get help, okay?”

Nagito would complain, remind Hinata that getting help involved causing more problems but honestly? Nagito couldn’t argue with Hinata’s expression of genuine care and love. The moment his hands had been clutching to his robes, he’d already lost.

Nagito’s cheeks when warm as Hinata offered out his hand. It took a moment, and a second gloved hand from Hinata before he could really stand again. He almost went tumbling back down onto the cold ground, and the cold wall, followed by cold glares,Nagito held onto Hinata's warm hand, and warm smile. Together, they moved forward, Nagito leaning onto his shoulder, and a warm hand around his waist, helping him limp weakly along in the cold air.

Nagito let a warm smile of his own go free.

⚮⚮⚮

“What’s the point of this again?” Nagito asked, staring calculatedly at a little black bean-like pebble in his hand. “I heard something about a game and that was it.”

 

Chiaki rolled her eyes, already clad in Pajamas even though it was just after dinner. “Ms.Yumi asked us to try out these fate flings…. Or something and.” She chuckled. “Kinda a crappy name, right?”

Nagito looked confused. “And Ms.Yumi is…. Who again? You seem to forget I don’t share half of your classes.”

 

“The Ghost that teaches Deviation.”

Nagito nodded. “Right… and what are they supposed to do?”

Chiaki patted the seat on the sofa next to her, the two in the empty Hufflepuff common room. “Here, lemme show you.” She smiled. “We're gonna have lots of fun.”

Nagito moved over to sit beside her, grateful that the magic that mended his broken bones had worked so well. Bonus points, nobody asked questions beyond Hinata. Nagito kept Mikan too flustered to question why she was giving him treatment anyways. At least he help the aspiring magical medic get some practice.

He peered closely at Chiaki, feeling a slight warmth coming from the crackling fire before them. She’d altered her hair color again today. Still a nice pink, but the tips were lavender and a nice cobalt blue gradient. She was perfecting her magic in the field of… hair dying.

She tucked up onto his side, leaning into him. Not out of love, or anything weird, but because she was lazy, and because she thought that everybody knew how not-straight Nagito was, so that if somebody were to walk in on them, they still wouldn’t confuse it.

“I must say, I’m slightly concerned, seeing as you put away your video games for this.”

 

She pouted. “Well, for your information, I came to have fun, not to be scolded… I hear Ms.Yumi’s offer and immediately thought about all the fun we could have playing this game.”

“Why not invite Hinata, instead of me?” After that afternoon, he wasn’t quite keen on facing Hinata again after that horrendous display he’d been subjected to. “You seem to appreciate his company more.” Who wouldn’t?

“You know that’s not true Nagito…” And her arms wrapped around his arm in a weird half hug. “He’s all yours…”

“FIne, he obviously like you more than he does me.”

 

“Also not true.” She said. “By the way, at this rate, you’ll owe me those 20 sickles. Hinata still hasn’t asked me out to the ball.”

Right… The ball.

It wasn’t like he’d forgotten about it, but it certainly wasn’t a topic he was willingly festering on. He and Chiaki had a bet, if Hinata asked her to the ball, she’d owe him 10 sickles, if he asked Nagito? He gave her 20. If he asked somebody else? She would give Nagito hugs and affection and advice on how to get over somebody.

“Speaking of the ball…” She smiled. “That’s why I took up Ms.Yumi on her offer to test these out. Before we begin though, you have to promise me you’ll help me fully test these out.”

Nagito stopped. “That- uh… that sounds shady. What exactly am I swearing myself to?”

“Do you love me or not?” She asked, her out deepening. “I promise it’s nothing you won’t regret when it’s done! Promise me?”

Nagito huffed. “You are so evil.” He groaned, giving in, holding out his wand hand to her. “I can smell your mischief from here.”

 

“You promise?” She asked, taking his hand, looking him in the eyes.

“I promise.” He said, gripping her hand tightly. He felt his cold fingertips fill with warmth again, not from a gloved hand, but from a hand offering him good intentions.

“Zure onerako.” Chiaki said, with a slight flick of her wand hand.

The bubbling in his hand stopped, now bond by a temporary magical contract. It was a spell similar to an unbreakable vow, but if you break it you’re forced only with misfortune for a few days, rather than death. Still, misfortune was never easy to go through in the magical world. People could tell when you’d broken a friendship trust, because you’d be in the infirmary twice a day for half a week without fail. Should you break one, you best perfect pain relieving charms fast.

“So… tell me what I’ve just walked into?” He asked, Still turning the little black bean in his hand.

‘Game time- yes!” She chirped. “Here, do you know what a magic 8-ball is?”

Nagito pursed his lips. He was a magical born child. He’d lived as a muggle homeless and in an orphanage for a time but “No… I’m not familiar with them.”

She opened her mouth, only to falter and close it. Apparently her pitch relied heavily on him knowing what it was. “Well- in that case, it’s better if I show you.”

 

She reached into the pocket of her robes which lay beside her on the couch, as she still leaned on Nagito’s arm wrapped in polar-fleece PJ’s. she drew out a handful of the little beans. “Future flingers, right? We uh… Ms.Yumi was looking for a better name.”

Chikaki rubbed the pebble twice under her thumb, brought it to her lips, breathed on it, before whispering “Will Nagito understand the rules of the game with this piece?” She asked.

Nagito watched in wonder as the little black pebble starting ticking… little clicking sounds coming from it after she asked before she threw it into the fire.

Suddenly, there was a large pop, and the flames turned an ashy purple, sprouting from the center of the flame, suddenly Nagito watched, wide eyed as a hunched Werewolf emerged from the flames, snarling at them, paws leaping out beyond the fireplace threshold, its eyes and mouth wide, rows of teeth, before it stopped, and disintegrated, crumbling into ashes.

Chiaki blinked, also looking shocked.

“... that genuinely looked pretty badass.” She said. “Apparently you don’t understand it?”

Nagito stared at her, dumbfounded. “Ah- no…”

Chiaki smiled. “That werewolf told me so.”

“What?”

 

“These pebble bean… things, tell the future!” She declared. “Well… at least, they should. We’re not sure how accurate they are. And they probably won’t be accurate all the time, especially because things change all the time, but depending on what animal you see… that- uh… tell your fortune… or… something like that.”

“You don’t sound too confident?”

 

“I'm not.” She admitted. “Ms.Yumi gave these to me for free on the account that I’d record my findings. They’re really hard to make, and she wants to know how accurate they are, so it’s up to us to test it. She DID say that they have one animal leway… like, it might be one off, one way or another. Phoenix's are yes, basilisks are probably, werewolves are probably not, and a dragon is a solid no.”

“Phoenix, basilisk, werewolf, dragon.” He listed off. “Got it… so how do we test it?”

“I was thinking… we do some guessing games, like 20 questions but instead of answering I have to guess, and see if the Flickers can guess things, and then we need to do some actal future seeing.”

 

Nagito stopped. He felt a subtle tingle run down his arms and he paused and started. “That means…” He knew where this was headed.

He stared at Chiaki’s devilishly wide grin. “Please don’t do this to me.” He begged. “I know what you’re doing.”

“Do what? She asked.

The ball… he groaned.

“Can you just… do it now so I won’t keep worrying about it?”

 

“Fine fine!” she agreed, nodding slightly. “So,” she rubbed the bean twice, breathed on it, and it began ticking as she asked “Will Hinata go out to the ball with Nagito if he asks?”

Nagito doubts he’s ever felt his heart beat so hard, hammering away in his chest as Chiaki threw it into the open flames. He stopped breathing as lavender blossomed in full from the center of the fire pit, dancing flames as the animal seemed to hesitate before emerging.

Nagito stopped altogether as a tail flicked out of the flames, a harsh cry from the pits of the fire and for a moment he shut his eyes. The serpentine tail was undeniable until-

“Nagito! Look!” Chiaki cried.

A basilisk, a grand, cold-blooded serpent arose, hissing and spitting as it emerged from the warm flames.

Nagito’s eyes widened as he felt Chiaki's warm hands cling onto his arm again. “YOU DID IT!” She said.

Only, as warm as the snake made him for a moment, there was still a chance of failure. If it was a Basilisk pure and simple, Hinata could still say no, and if it was off… and was a werewolf, Nagito was certainly out of luck.

Still, seeing the basilisk greet him put a smile on his face. Call him a team player, Hinata was a Slytherin, and certainly, that had to be a good omen of some kind.

⚮⚮⚮

“Chiaki… I can’t do this.” He choked out, looking up at her, slightly horrified. “This was- this was so much easier in my head- My luck is going to disgrace me again!”

His hands were sweaty, warm and sticky around a cold bundle of Asphodel branches- here he was, ready to give Hinata flowers to ask him to the… yule… ...ball…

 

“I can’t do this!” He cried again, cowering behind the corridor. “I’m telling you- He’ll look at me funny- and our friendship will be facing over!”

He took a step forward to run away, out from the corner in the hallway, gripping onto his lilies, a little parchment paper tied to the ribbon around it. “Go to the Ball with me?” it read.

… Chiaki had to write the note for him. HIs hands were trembling so badly he couldn’t write a simple sentence or two. Ink was splattered everywhere, and his letters looked like they were forged during an earthquake. If that didn’t give away the fact that he was idly hoping that they went as more than friends, he didn’t know what would.

… okay, other than the flowers.

…

…… and other than the terrified look in his eyes, and the blush on his face that would no doubt be there when he asked without fail. He just knew it, don’t ask him why.

He felt Chiaki grab his shoulder, tugging him back lightly, trying to make sure he didn’t stray far. “Look. I’m not letting you run away from this! You can do this! Think of the basilisk!”

Nagito bit his lips, he could quite literally feel himself tremble in his shoes. Petrified. Like he was surrounded by scary things, monsters, people ready to kill him, people with guns, his own insecurities, drowning in every bad thing, but now moving an inch. “Think to the Tengu!” He responded. “I’ve been cursed for… for 13 years! I’ll wait it out! Wait until after we graduate! Right?”

Chiaki looked at him. “Nagito, you can’t use the red bird man of bad luck to get out of things that are maybe a little scary.”

“MAYBE A LITTLE SCARY? Oh, I’m sorry, do you not understand what it’s like to be cursed by a Tengu? It’s 13 years of your life that are nothing but suffering!”

Chiaki looked rather ticked off by that. “Are you really going to give in so easily? Nagito, you’ll be suffering on the night of the Yule ball no matter who you do or do not go with unless you go with Hinata. Hinata makes you happy, I say go for it!”

Nagito spluttered. “Easy for you to say!” But he knew Chiaki was right. The night of the Yule Ball marked another day he would cry into his pillow. Knowing what he wanted more than life itself, and knowing he would never have it. Knowing it would be off in the castle, dancing with somebody else. Girl, boy, it didn’t matter.

Only, there was no more time for arguing. Turns out that stealing his nerves takes time, and he heard loud bangs as wooden doors collided with the stone wall. The large class that just sat through history of magic suddenly came bursting through the double doors. Suddenly, kids were filling out past him, some glared at him as they spotted him around the bend, looking at him funny, with his warm face and hands, clutching flowers, trembling with Chiaki standing behind him. It only took a moment for Hinata to emerge from the classroom and walk past the corner where Nagito lay in wait for him.

“Hi-Hinata?!” He squealed awkwardly, his voice sounding like a disgusting screech against his own ears, clumsily catching Hinata’s attention from across the hall. He grabbed the attention all the surrounding students and suddenly felt as though he may as well be naked and covered in blood before a pack of sharks.

Hinata, faltered back, retracting a single step as he stared at Nagito. If he hadn’t already wanted to crawl into a hole and die there.

“Nagito- hey- are you okay?”

Hinata stands still, a cold, harsh light from the window behind him forcing Nagito to squint. Other students start walking slower, but Nagito glances around nervously in silence until they have dispersed, refusing to fuel their gossip.

Hinata follows his gaze at the back of the mob that passed them, glancing at them nervously.

Finally his sheepish gaze and crooked smile swishes his mismatched eyes look up at him. Good god, he looks like a puppy sometimes… if you squint. And are undeniable really, exceedingly gay.

“Hey…” Nagito stammered somehow. He’s hyperventilating, everything is in hyperfocus, nothing is right, come on boy, think!

YOU CAN’T

Nagito felt his knees get weak. As Hinata just stared at him up and down, he was clamming up so badly, he experimentally tried to flick his finger in a moment of genius, only to lose grip on the flowers, and almost drop them. HIs face buried into his hand knit scarf on instinct. There was nothing but silence and Hinata staring. Dumbfounded, not knowing what to say or what to make of it.

Chiaki suddenly gave Nagito a hearty shove forward, sending him stumbling forward, grappling for words, glaring at him as she pouted, before turning to look at Hinata and he was…

Right there.

Hinata blinked at him surprised.

“Nagito?”

Their noses were touching, their goddamn noses brushed, Nagito’s face burst into warmth, and a cold feel rose in his stomach. He’d fucked this up, he’d fucked this whole operation up so badly, abort, ABORT!

 

WIthout another word, Nagito threw the flowers into Hinata’s hands and bolted, past Chiaki and in the general direction of the Hufflepuff common room.He didn’t look back, didn’t let Hinata get in a word edgewise, and hey. If Hinata planned on rejecting him, which of course he would, Chiaki could break it easier to him.

Nagito wasn’t ready for Hinata to coldly break his warm heart. All he wanted was companionship, but sometimes it was more hot and cold than you would really like it to be.

⚮⚮⚮

Whether or not Chiaki would break it easy to him was irrelevant as it so happens, because the moment Nagito walked into the common room he remembers he had no further classes. He locked himself in the boy's room, away from Chiaki, pulling close the curtain of the 4 poster bed, He ended up falling face first into the pillow. The scene playing out again and again in slow motion as he saw Hinata. Again and again. Watching him. His slight jump, his shocked expression when they’d been pushed so close. Nagito could’ve just… pulled him the slightest bit close and kissed him right there. Only, that would be insolent and cruel to Hinata, and he was the one who really mattered then and there. And forever, anybody was more important than him.

Hinata would reject him, and cast him out of his life. Nagito would only have Chiaki… and that would never be the same.

He groaned, throwing his scarf to the floor after ripping it off. Not bothering to change or anything. He could worry about it in the morning. He’d gotten no sleep the night before, with Chiaki, up late throwing pellets onto fire, asking questions, or the day before, choking down skele gro after the spell to fix his wrist went ari, and he was tired remembering his totally beating. With some weird… confession today, Nagito wanted nothing more than to skip out of the shitstrom of depression already pooling up around him in sweet sleep. Skipping dinner, and missed by none, Nagito slid under the cold covers, hugged them close, waiting for them to warm up around them.

⚮⚮⚮

Nagito didn’t know what came over him, when he woke up, he blinked, blurry eyes at the ceiling. Like he’d never woken up before, and everything in the world that materialized around him was something totally new. He’d slept through dinner and into the morning. He rolls over when everything it’s him like a ton of bricks being dropped on his head.he cast his eyes downwards, defeated, ready to get up, and cut Hinata out from his life. He studied the floor for a moment, suddenly wondering how many people would care if he were to jump off one of the towers and kill himself.

He’d been such and idiot.

He glared at the floor, knowing that getting up to go to Potions class is the last thing he wanted to do. He saw his scarf, wrapped up nicely, a perfected folded square, and he studies the dark blue fringe of the knit fabric, tracing the yarn with his eyes. Hinata had spent all of last winter break learning how to knit that for him. They had laughed, gotten frustrated, Nagito kept insisting that he could do it, knowing how to knit himself, but Hinata always refused. Hinata had felt guilty he didn’t have a present for Nagito, not having a family to go home too and not having much money. Nagito was flattered and happy to receive it, throwing the 3-year-old Hufflepuff scarf he’d had since the first year immediately in favor of it. There were 2 rows at one end, the end Hinata started with crooked stitches that had caught with the ones above it, but Nagito liked that imperfection, he decided as he stared at it longingly with dreary eyes.

… Wait- it was folded?

He sat up immediately and reached out for it. And when his legs were numbly kicked over the edge of his head, he heard a crackle from within the scarf as he grabbed it off the floor.

He unfolded it, palm up, fingers uncoordinated, as he opened it twice, and saw a crumpled piece of parchment lay on the cloth.

Nagito, I would love to go to the ball with you.

Hinata ♡  
Nagito sat, frozen solid for a moment.

…

He read it again.

Nagito, I would love to go to the ball with you.

Hinata ♡

That was a… yes?

He stared at it dumbfounded. “I would love to go to the ball with you.”... “I would love to.”

 

There was even a little scribbled heart by his name, but surely Hinata had accepted this on the term that they were going as friends? Not as… whatever else they could be. Nagito wasn’t quite sure he could follow Hinata’s train of thought on that one. What was Hinata thinking?

Chiaki must’ve snuck up to give it to him. It was undoubtedly Hinata’s handwriting…

He covered his face in his hands, There wasn’t even anybody around, but he felt embarrassed to be blushing this hard to himself. He didn’t give himself much preparation time… the ball was in two days… he didn’t expect he’d be going at all. He didn’t count on Chikai bonding him to the idea. He was going with Hinata…

He suddenly realized that he didn’t have anything to wear.

…

He didn’t know how to dance either.

He groaned. This might be worse. He would ruin Hinata’s only Yule Ball by being completely unprepared. Supposedly they were going to ‘teach dancing’ but… he wasn’t so sure about it.

Chiaki’s warm words came back to him in that cold morning moment. “Are you really going to give in so easily?” He could almost hear her say it now, looking down on him. He remembered something she always said when it came to her puzzle games. “There’s always a solution if you look hard enough.”

 

Nagito huffed. He should hurry down to breakfast so he doesn’t miss it. Maybe he could ask Gundam about borrowing some clothes. He’d find a way.

⚮⚮⚮  
Nagito doubt’s he’s ever shaken so much in his life. Even with the events of the past couple days to stack it against. He didn’t tremble half as much when being beaten into a stone wall on a chilly winter’s day. Even throwing flowers into Hinata’s hands in a blank hallway with Chiaki didn’t get him this shaken. No, he stood, looking in a bathroom mirror at himself. The only dress clothes he had to wear. Courtesy of Gundam.

He didn’t want to blame Gundam, without him, he wouldn’t have anything to wear it all. Not by any means. But…

He stared at his own pale face, an ugly reminder that he would never be pretty enough for anybody. Ugly was right.

This wasn’t “dress attire”... this was a dress, period.

He looked like a goddamn woman.

It was a one piece, white… a gown like thing, the tips of it a nice pale icy blue. A pure white folded, collared neck. There was a white belt around it, and eight buttons, two rows of four, THe sleeves were long, but the dress like attire separated into an open cloth above the knee, where it exposed his legs in the front…

“Oh dear… dear god.”

He looked up and down at himself again. It was all Gundam had to offer him, but Nagito hadn’t really seen it until he unfolded it just then.

He was going to be the laughing stock, he was going to humiliate Hinata, forget about him, since when did he matter?

 

His dancing shoes were somewhat appropriate, silver shoes, with a little bit of width. He would be lying if he said he hadn’t made Chiaki practice dancing with him for all the nights before it. Both in their pajamas, but always practicing in the right shoes. She was going with Mikan, bless her, and Nagito couldn’t be happier to see a smile on her face as they both learned to follow and lead. It was expectancy, and anxiety, as well as a giddy feeling in his chest all at once… until he got his hands on his outfit and now…

...this.

He’s contemplating pointing his wand at himself and whispering a forbidden curse when he remembers it’s still partially broken, and it would most likely backfire and would end up killing somebody else. Fuck you too, Tengu.

Suddenly a voice pierces through the air and comes to stab him.

 

“My my Nagito! Looking to get some actin’ tonight’ in that?” came a voice burden with a heavy accent.

Nagito jumped, and almost tripped in his elevated shoes, whipping around to see Teruteru in… actual dress robes that didn’t make him look like a fool. “How daring! Who’s the main dish tonight~?”

 

Nagito flushed and turned away. This wasn’t going to end well. “Are you making a sex joke, or are you genuinely curious who I’m going with?” He asked steadily.

Teruteru, striding to lean on the sink beside Nagito, looking at him just smirked. “Both.”

“I don’t want to make love to anybody.” Nagito insisted, which wasn’t entirely true, but he-he what kind of question-!?

“But I somehow got a date with… Hinata.” Saying the name aloud was like somebody had dropped a barbell in his heart. Maybe his rib was still broken, and it was just a higher rib then he recalled. Going with Hinata made him more than a little giddy.He knows he shouldn’t be bragging about it, but Hinata was such a catch… and he was about to ruin it, make it all crash and burn, so why not enjoy it while it lasted? Even if that meant bragging to Teruteru in a bathroom in a woman's dress.

“Hinata? You two fine’ly goin’ ou’?”

“Not after tonight… no.” He admitted.

He glanced over at Teruteru, and released by the horrified look on his face that most people never hit the point in their lifetime were they spilled all their secrets to him. Most people’s ‘rock bottom’ still was above this creep. Nagito though, wasn’t most people.

“You breakin’ up with him?!” Teruteru asked. “Whateva for? He’s handsome and kind- and you look enamor’ with him, if I do say so myself!”

Nagito huffed, looking over at him. This is it, this is what his life had come too. “I’m not breaking up with him… I think he thinks we’re going as friends. But I- … with my luck I’m just going to ruin it all.”

Teruteru stopped, shifting hispudgly weight onto the sink a little more, leaning closer to the wall so he could try to catch Nagito’s down-trained eyes. “You’re going as friends, and you’re dressed like that?”

“It’s Gundam’s!” Nagito admitted. “I didn’t think I was going, so I didn’t buy any dress robes last Hogsmeade trip… I knew Hinata wouldn’t want to go with me. Now I’m stuck with it- don’t remind me.”

“Well, I think you look wonderful Nagito!” He chirped, accent… not getting any lighter.

 

“Is that a compliment, or are you hitting on me?”

Teruteru looked vaguely insulted. “I have enough respect for you to not hit on you now- not when Hinata could beat me in a duel- besides, Nekomaru seems like a guy who wants a loyal man.”

Nagito stopped. “You’re going with Nekomaru?! What happened to Akane?”

 

Teruteru shrugged. “Hospital wing for a bit, Nekomaru willingly went with me as a motivational figure, but I’ll be trying to get in whatever action I can.”

Nagito felt vaguely disgusted. “Yeah… good luck with that.”

He almost felt the need to point out that Akane could also beat him in a deal, or a fist fight, but Nagito wouldn’t want him as taking that as initiative to start hitting on him. Then again, Teruteru probably knew that he stood no chance against the star of the Gryffindor quidditch team… was he maybe growing some respect?

“So- I take it you want Hinata to spread your legs open’ and fuck you like a jackrabbit’?”

...And we’re back.

Nagito felt his face grow redder. “Wha- NO!”

“I’m jokin’, I’m jokin’, boy- you sure do get your smechenwhepper in a knot easy, huh’?”

“Smechenwhepper?” Nagito paraphrased. “Are you talking about my-”

“Seriously tho’...” Teruteru said, refusing to answer any questions. “No friend goes to a ball dressed like that to appease some feminization fetish their date has, Nagito- you go full out and make an excuse, or you sit there, and be laughed at.”

“Wait- I don’t get what you’re saying… wait- his FETI-”

Teruteru raised his finger. “You need to commit to being feminine, you won’t stand out as much. It’ll be planned! Just tell Hinata that you thought he’d like it- if he asks.”

“But- I kinda want to know if-” Teruteru automatically shushed him.

“He’s Pansekual’ honey, I know one when I see one’, don’t worry. Just becau’ you’re going looking like a woman… doesn’t make your gayness any less genuine.”

Nagito looked surprised, felt so too. Teruteru genuinely nailed down his problem.

“You ain’t trynna be a girl, you just are goin’ with da flow… Not devaluin’ the romance two men can’ have.”

Nagito stared back into the sink, trying to process it. “I mean… I guess.”

“Lemme help you honey.” Teruteru offered. Maybe he wasn’t such a bad guy. “I’ll go steal a hair tie from the girls dorms, swipe a flower or two, and we’ll see what we can do to fix that hair of yours, okay?”

“You uh… will sneak into the girls common room? They’re probably all changing.” Nagito warned.

“It’s not the first time I’ve done it.” He said with a wink. And Nagito suddenly felt creeped out all over again. “Any request on flowers? I can’t guarantee anythin’ but huffle’ gals usually gotta good assortment’.”

Nagito thought for a moment- how the hell was he supposed to know what flowers they had for his pick? All he knew was that Chiaki had some leftover…

“Asphodel…” he whispered. “Chiaki will have some extra Asphodel. Get that- please!”

Teruteru smiled. “A surprise demand- that’s fin’, I love a demanin’ man!”

Before Nagito could ask what he really meant, Teruteru was already gone.

Nagito stared at himself in the mirror again, backing up.

… maybe he did look better than usual in this.

 

⚮⚮⚮

Hinata had no idea what he was seeing. Chiaki waiting for Mikan as he waiting for Nagito at the bottom of the stares, he forgets what he was even talking about when Chikai stopping nervously squirming, and the bottom of her purple ruffle dress swayed without her.

“Is that Nagito?” She asked, wide eyes, gazing at the top of the stairs. Hinata was about to punch her arm- make fun of him by faking a dreamy ‘is that so-and-so-’ act to tease him. But he supposed he would have fallen for it if it had been an act, because he did look at the top of the stairs.

HIs lips suddenly stuck together, but his jaw did slack behind it, blinking- he didn’t believe his eyes. Nagito looked like a prince. A long gown-like coat dress… white with blue… and oh god. Hinata felt his Shoulder twitch up to his neck with nervousness. What the fuck?

Nagito’s hair was tied together in some wavy side braid, and there were a few flowers tucked in there for good measure…

Hinata stared up in awe. Nagito looked taller in the outfit somehow, and… oh god, he was so hot. Hinata watched as Nagito carefully made his way down the steps and saw him, Hinata’s sure his face is a tomato by the time Nagito standing before him. Hinata just exhales as normally as he can, like the average kid he is, and smiles at a nervous looking Nagito. Suddenly, his voice jumps out faster than his brain can rangle it.

“Wow, you look am-amazing!” He’s bright red, he can feel it, Nagito looks… so good. Even better than normal, haha… this was a mistake, wasn’t it?

He looked… as pretty as a girl for lack of a better word. Nagito, looking nervous himself just shrugged. “Beautiful or handsome?” He teased lightly. And one again, Hinata couldn’t think before he blurted. “Both.”

Nagito paused, taking in Hinata’s immediate and loud one-word response. He heard a faint, muffled giggle from Chiaki behind them,

Nagito shuffled in silver dance shoes. “Thank..s”

Hinata couldn’t help but maintain his staring. It was unreal how nice Nagito looked in that. Maybe he was looking through rose tinted glasses, due to all of the hype and buildup that had gone into that night, but Hinata couldn’t see a better-looking guy in the whole ballroom.

The great hall had been completely transformed. they went with a very minimalistic Winter theme. Large 2-D birch trees came from the ground, looking like they were paper cutouts, pure white, all the ridges of the bark was cut out, rather than colored. Fireflies danced around the celing, everything glowed, and the ground was coated in a false ice that made even the floor you walked upon dazzle. Carpets of snow came in patches, and the red carpet was the Triwizard tournament finalists would be dancing was a blue silk lay down, embroidered with snowflakes. The house animals danced around the ceiling like ghosts. Pale holograms of snowy burrows were projected. A badger poking in and out, dashing across the field, the snake hissing, and a grand Lion roaring atop the largest one. The raven swooped down, below the borrows overhead, squeaking madly. He could spy Tsubasa Kamii ghost offering flowers to the ghost of Taro Kurosaki. Hinata hoped they were happy in their afterlife together. He didn’t question how ghost got flowers, or new objects of any kind anyways, but he didn’t care. That was their problem. His heart felt pressurized and ended up sinking low into his chest remembering Nagito giving him flowers. He’d looked so scared as he thrust the lilies towards him. Even as a friend, Nagito looked terrified. Probably thanks to self-deprecation. Hinata smiled, seeing Nagito weave the same flowers in his hair.

“They made this look rather nice didn’t they?” Nagito commented, following Hinata’s gaze. “The Slytherin snake looks amazing.”

Hinata nodded. Staring upwards, watching the raven as it glided over the badger who lightly pawed at it for a moment. “The floor is impressive too… it’s not slippery.”

Immediately, Hinata knew it was a rather foolish thing to say. He got a little flustered and overwhelmed, especially when his lack of game was being observed by Chiaki as well as the boy he was actually trying to woo.

…

… I mean- where was he?

Nagito looked briefly uncomfortable, and Hinata realized for a moment that he was staring at him. Something that didn’t help his rapidly disintegrating composure.

“Oh!” Hinata heard Chiaki cry out in happiness, and bolted off. He lost sight of her before she could see where she was headed, but it sounded like she’d found Mikan.

Hinata sighed, knowing that she would probably be gone for the rest of the night, before tensing up, realizing that Nagito’s gaze was now on him. “So… what now?” He asked, and Hinata took a brief moment to look at the flowers in Nagito’s braided hair… he really knew how to do it well. Braid his hair, he means, he wonders if he’d done it before.

Hinata thought for a solid three seconds before he realized he had no idea. He was coming up short of anything. “I… honestly don’t know.” He admitted. “What would you like to do?”

 

Nagito gave a passive shrug. “I don’t mind either way… It’s going to start in a few minutes.”

Hinata nodded. He wasn’t sure how confident he was on the dancefloor, but… he thinks Nagito might be able to lead for him.

“If you even want to go… that is.” Nagito pulls him out of staring at him again, this time at the fabric draping over his legs. “I mean- we can still call it off, you could probably find a better date.”

“Nonsense.” He assured him. “I accepted your offer! Nagito… I do want to be here with you.” He doesn’t add on the as a friend part, and he notes that Nagito hadn’t either.

“I suppose.” He huffed. “I’m just not sure what you’re hoping to get out of this… Something might go terribly.”

Hinata looked over. “What makes you say that? Nagito… I trust you. And if in some way you do ruin this for me… I forgive you.” Hinata’s smile might be blinding. “Just know that our friendship can’t be ruined overnight.”

____

 

Nagito almost gags on the word. Friendship.

Suddenly, there is loud bird sound ringing through the hall. The chatter dies off immediately, as Echoes of bird speak bounces from wall to wall.

Bells start chiming. One, two, three… four, five… Before FInally, a traditional slow song begins to play in the background. Headmaster Kirigiri, dressed in purple robes, announces the opening of the ball and runs through the names of the 3 participants of the Triwizard tournament. Nagito just glanced nervously around for anything that could potentially fall and kill somebody. Which would be his fault, because of course, it would be.

“Let the ball begin!” Was all Nagito tuned in to hear? He looked at Hinata distressed. “Are you leading or following?” he asked nervously. He didn’t know why he was nervous, he should be okay either way, but nothing was ever really okay.

“Following.” He replied, without hesitation. “You uh… lead the way.”

Nagito felt his face burning, and he prayed that some strength would return in his knees soon because, at this rate, he would make a fool of himself without fail.

The song starts playing and for a moment, Nagito forgot how to begin. He’s ready to die when he feels Hinata’s hand at his waist and is ready to melt into a puddle at the boy's feet when their eyes meet and Hinata shoots him an encouraging smile. Nagito feels a spark of confidence, as he feels Hinata’s other hand squeezing his shoulder as they begin to trace the designated steps they were taught. Hinata’s looking down at his feet as they start with a simple box step.

Hinata missteps nearly trips over himself. Nagito pulls him in a little closer as he let out a yelp. “I got you!” Nagito blurted, pulling Hinata closer as he gets his feet in order.

“Yeah- thanks… Sorry, I’m no good at this.”

“You’re doing fine!” Nagito assured him, suddenly stepping forward. His mind didn’t have much time to process what he was even doing when his body moved on its own, spinning Hinata, before reclaiming him in his arms.

Nagito, for as emotionally tapped out as he was from over embarrassment, could feel a momentous moment arise. He was flustered beyond the point of recognition. Hinata looked rather sheepish following along, but soon, Nagito found himself not thinking about what he was doing and simply… living it.

Hinata briefly stumbled again, but instead of seeming discouraged, Hinata started laughing. Like there was no place he'd rather be, then tripping over his own feet in a cold Ballroom with Nagito’s cold hands gripping onto him. Hinata’s warm smile made Nagito feel like he was floating. Nothing mattered anymore. Nothing cold or bad could ever even graze him there, with Hinata, tripping over each other with the warmest of smiles.

Towards the end of the song, Nagito took initiative to dip Hinata, and surprisingly… he didn’t drop him. Hinata didn’t even look afraid, he looked Nagito right in the eye as he went down and up. Clinging close to each other they finished, and the song ended.

The hall broke out into thunderous applause, and Nagito didn’t quite realize what was happening until Hinata leaned in just the slightest bit closer, eyes closed, and kissed him gently.

It didn’t matter that Hinata’s lips were chapped from cold days, or that the ballroom had a chill hanging around it. All Nagito could feel was the warmth bursting inside of him, and warm lips as they move against his own. It’s a warmth that could keep him warm for a while.


End file.
